For those of my generation who simply do not, and cannot, comprehend why Facebook exists — I am trying to make friends outside of Facebook while applying the same principles.
Therefore, every day I walk down the street and tell passersby what I have eaten, how I feel at the moment, what I have done the night before, what I'm doing now, what I will be doing later and with whom, and where I'm going next, and ask them to follow me along and watch me be important.
Then I give them pictures of my family, my dog, and of me gardening, taking things apart in the garage, watering the lawn, standing in front of landmarks, washing the car, driving around town, eating lunch, getting a haircut, and doing what anybody and everybody does every day.
I also listen to their conversations, give them the "thumbs up" and tell them I like them and will be friends with them. It all works just like Facebook. Only I do it face to face, not on a little glass screen.
I already have four people following me — two police officers, a private investigator, and a psychiatrist. 
